Perhaps the best reunions of all time, the Ninth saw many firsts.
Just as I grabbed a beer from the kind beer steward, the heavens opened up. Opaque walls of water hit the ground with the sound of a Niagara waterfall chug.
"You have to keep moving," the proctor warned. I averted my eyes and adjusted my hat.
"You have to leave the tent," the proctor warned again, although he wasn't getting angry. He realized he was ordering a dry lamb into a horrifically wet slaughter.
I stared at him blankly, stalling for time. It was coming down harder now. Leaving the beer tent would be a complete disaster. A potential solution flashed in my head. "If I chug my beer, can I stay in here?"
"Uhhh, yes. Yes I guess." The idea had caught him off guard; I seized the moment and sloppily chugged the full beer. The cold carbonation left a searing pain in my esophagus; I put my hands on my knees and spit saliva. But then it went away.
"That was close," I notified the proctor and whirled to refill my cup. A slight tinge of amusement snuck across his face, but only for a moment. Then he was back to, "You must leave the tent now."
I buried the second draft without hesitation and returned to the tap. Obviously, this pace was unsustainable, so with a full beer I dove out of the beer tent into the wetness and dashed for the main tent. I made it, but somewhere in between dropped my beer. This detail proved to be a crucial ingredient in what was about to happen.
In the main tent, I spent some time drying off, talking with friends, and generally having a good time. The beer flowed sweetly through me but soon its voice could not be muted: "two good chugs deserve another". The beer tent was an impossible trek back through an unwavering wall of rain. The situation called for a drastic action.
What happened next was both obvious and genius, the culmination of years of reunions chugging, bringing the act clearly to a higher level of stupidity that had remained elusive until now. I asked Effex to capture the event.
With the camera rolling, I nonchalantly crossed the floor and swooped in on Beet's unsuspecting beer. As you can see, I grabbed the cup too slowly and Beet easily thwarted my attempt. However, the idea had been born, the chasm had been crossed.
Effex instantly grasped the significance of the breakthrough. "Whoah that needs a name. How 'bout the Grab and Chug? GNC for short," he brainstormed, and at once we both knew the name would stick.
To demonstrate the GNC, we staged a GNC to fully capture the concept lest it get lost in the chaos. The rest of the night spiraled out of control and we completely forgot about the GNC, yet the GNC video survived.
As we slowly assembled at the P-Rade the next day, the last thing anyone wanted to think about was GNCing. However, minutes and a few shotguns later, talk of the GNC filled us with giddiness. Out at the Street, beer flowed like water from every spigot. If anything there was a vast over-supply, not a shortage like the previous night. Still, it was time to roll out the GNC.
The ensuing hours saw a series of first evers in an increasingly daring and sloppy cavalcade of GNCs. Here are some videos of notable firsts:
Jotes executes the first ever GNC to a random victim. He takes a deep breath, collects himself, and swoops in. You can keep it!
Stone spontaneously innovates the GNC and exhibits what is now considered Classic form. Specifically, the cup slam down immediately after the chug is the key move that propelled the GNC to its current form.
Stone successfully executes the first ever to the delight of pregnant audience. However, without Classic form (no slam down). Probably would've been excessive to smash the pitcher.
Juice chugs her way into the history books.
The taps shut down, the crowds filtered away. Lingerers lingered, nurses nursed their last beers. T-Mass somehow managed to keep his full beer intact until the very end. But in swooped Stone with a final, perfectly executed GNC that left T-Mass dumbfounded and signaled the very end of the Ninth Year Reunion.
The GNC: A Ninth Year Reunion Tradition.
T-Mass celebrates with the President. She's definitely a good sport
Hosted in the springtime splendor of Richmond, Houseparties '07 proved a worthy training ground for the upcoming Ninth. The momentum built up from this event carried through till the last late night Wa Run of Reunions. A shout out to T Mass for pulling everything off. See videos and photos…
Alas for poor victims Toad, DHinny, Long Haul, and Donutdude. Read more…